So, I was just writing a scene where Our Heroine happens to be on a high balcony and she can see the tops of many buildings below her. And then Word wanted me to change “rooves.” Aware that Word Spellchecker has the IQ of retarded lettuce, I went to the dictionary. No entry. I turned to Google, and there the Urban Dictionary gave the definition as:

The plural of “roof,” for people too dumb to know that the real word is “roofs.”

Whatever happened to poor old “rooves?”

I mean, the plural of loaf is loaves, dwarf is dwarves, and chief is chives. Okay, maybe not on that last one. But I’m sorry to see poor, downtrodden rooves, the way I’ve been pronouncing it all my life, get smacked around like that.

Also, Google helpfully suggested two searches that may be related to rooves: “pituitary gland” and “anaconda.” What the heck?